Philippe est misérable

Hello from Double Espresso’s cabin where we serve dollops of cold foamy salty water followed by slatting sails in a lumpy sea.
I think I had a good start. I put a reef midway in the Bay and shook it off a little while after going under the bridge. Then it was two reefs and, following the plan, well past the Farallon Islands, I bore off a little. It’s been hard steering well and I think I’ve been losing ground. We were getting in high tens. I think I saw 4 boats ahead of me. They kept on more westerly course.
I’m now limping as the sails can barely hold the wind for a couple seconds before a roller comes in and shakes it out.
The fast race was not to be. I’ll keep on trucking … I’m lying in the forepeak borderline sea sick. And, yes, I can’t shake a feeling of frustration.
A couple of things happened: the second reef line came off the boom (saw that before I pulled it through completely) and a bowline came off on the jib clew. And the tiller wand is screaming in pain, making it really hard to relax.
The tracker somehow lost its GPS fix (so did the VHF btw) but that’s fixed and you can probably see my 3kts of speed, if that.
What’s on the bright side?

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